One Child Too Many
This is the second episode of Patrick's Playground. (Episode starts with Patrick Jr. playing on his Switch) Patrick Jr.: Take that, zombie! (the zombie dies) Patrick: Careful, son, you don't wanna die to those zombies. Patrick Jr.: That was the only one, dad. Patrick: Oh. Anyway, I'll be leaving for an uhh… business trip. So you'll have a babysitter. Patrick Jr. I'm not furniture! Patrick: I know you aren't, but I had to find one for you anyway. (He hears a car stop) That's him, goodbye now! Patrick Jr.: Daddy, wait...! (he had already left) Dang it. Squidward: So, let's get this over with. I’m Squidward, your babysitter. And I'm here to sit on yo- I MEAN… take care of you while your father is gone. Patrick Jr.: Yay… Squidward: So, are we gonna sit around all day or actually do something? Patrick Jr.: How about... (Cut to Squidward and PJR playing Minecraft on the Switch) Squidward: How do you chop wood again? Patrick Jr.: You hold ZR… Squidward: Oh, got it. Dang it, died again! Patrick Jr.: Maybe don’t fall into that giant ravine again. Squidward: (grumbles) Patrick Jr.: Yeah this isn't working out. Let's try something else. Squidward: I got an idea. How about a little clarinet solo? (starts playing his clarinet, and PJR covers his nonexistent ears) Patrick Jr.: Stop playing that horrid music! Squidward: (stops) What do you mean it's horrid? I've been practicing for over 30 years! Patrick Jr.: Damn you're old! Squidward: Wh- no I'm not old! 60 is old! Not 33! Patrick Jr.: Whatever. I'm hungry. What is there to eat? Squidward: Let's see here… (opens sand fridge) It's all just sand, no real food. Lemme cook something legit. (25-30 minutes later…) Squidward: Viola! Casserole a la Squidward! (a somewhat disgusting-looking dish is shown) Patrick Jr.: Ew. Whatever, I'm starving! (eats the dish) What's in this thing? Squidward: Ask Squidipedia. I used one of their recipes. Patrick Jr.: (spits out pulp) Pulp?! Why would there be pulp in a casserole? Squidward: It gives it more flavor. Patrick Jr.: Again, ew. Not hungry anymore, you can have the rest. (throws the dish in Squidward's face) Squidward: Le ouch! That hurt! (throws the dish back at him, and they start having a food fight) (Cut to Patrick eating ice cream at Dairy Scream) Patrick: Mmmmm, this ice cream is heavenly. Welp, my business trip is over. Time to check on the kid. (Patrick has arrived home) Patrick: What in the- (The two are done with their food fight, and their faces are covered with sand and slime) Squidward: It's all fun and games, Patrick. Patrick Jr.: Yeah, it was fun. Patrick: Ok, good. You did a good job, Squidward, here's your payment (hands him 20 dollars) Squidward: Wow, thanks. Call me when you need me to babysit again. Patrick Jr.: (burps out a tentacle, causing Squidward to get wide-eyed, ending the episode) Category:2019 Category:Transcripts Category:Patrick's Playground Category:Episodes written by FireMatch Category:Episodes Category:Episode Transcripts Category:2019 Episodes